Wedding dress

As many of you may know, Rich & I are getting married in Feb. I'm having a real dilemma about what is the correct etiquette for a middle aged, pleasantly plump (although I'll be a size 8 by then, obviously, if I give up my love of wine & curly whirlies) woman to wear on her wedding day. The first time around I had a choice of only 2 dresses as they were in the sale, so I picked the best one and somebody sewed sequins on it to jazz it up a bit, sadly that dress got incinerated in a garden fire, istigated by my phyco ex! Not my ex husband, he wasn't phyco, infact he was very nice but I was a bad wife. Anyway it went up in flames, almost taking the neighbours fence with it, whilst my very young children charged around with hoses, wearing hard hats, pretending they were fire men. I've been looking on the internet at dresses and to be honest they all look the same, apart from the one made of feathers to which I'm hugely attracted to but I'm realistic enough to know that instead of a fine, white swan I'd look more like an overstuffed pillow! I thought I'd cracked it and found something very suitable but Rich managed to convince me to show him a picture and said 'thats f**king awful, that is' so although I've chosen my pink cowboy boots (thanks Bexx Cowen) I'm feeling very confused. Time is running out!!! Any thoughts anybody?